When Sex Turns Hilarious
Today we are going to share some of the funniest things people have had said to them during sex. Sex can be hilarious and a little weird after all.
Sex is great after all but some things can get lost in translation, or just should be said whilst getting down and dirty.
We start with first time sex -
"It's just like putting in a big tampon!"
It was her first time so she was on top fumbling around for awhile, and when she finally got it in she let out a happy little squeak and said that with the proudest expression on her face.
Try to leave movies outside the bedroom, unless its 50 shades of grey -
''My wife after sex once turned round to me and said "That'll do pig. That'll do."''
Quotes from Babe are never going to go down well.
A bit of wizardry is probably a bit strange to.
Shazam he said as he came, was that the day he became a man?
Maybe bringing up a tv show you watched earlier isn't the best thing for getting hot and steamy - unless you like the kind of thing.
We had been talking about vikings jokingly earlier so mid session she calls out "Pillage my village!" We didn't finish because we couldn't stop laughing for the next 20 minutes.
And finally we move onto food. as we all now food play can be awesome. licking fresh cream off each other etc etc but not when your partner doesn't know and not when you drop a food stuff into a sexy sentence or when food can make you sore.-
"Are you eating gummy worms?"
We were going Doggy style and I didn't think she would notice.
After a minute of doing butt stuff...
"Did you eat something spicy yesterday?"
"My junk's on fire!"
"You like that you saucy biscuit?"